Can you believe it’s finally September? Summer is officially over & we’re diving head first into fall - the season of Pumpkin Spice Lattes & Presidential Primaries, because who doesn’t put those two things together?
Speaking of POTUS, last week there was a major mic drop moment forcing a merge in the political & entertainment worlds. Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you’ve heard that Kanye West announced that he intends to run for President of the United States in the year 2020.
What you might have missed if you weren’t watching the hyped-up fever dream that was the MTV Video Music Award’s was the speech leading up to the announcement in which President Mr. West claims to go grocery shopping with his daughter & continues to shout “LISTEN TO THE KIDS, BRUH!” Let’s just all take a minute to reflect on the fact that if Kanye becomes President, Kim would be the First Lady. TRUST.
Brace yourself if you’re headed to Boston - that city is one big party right now regarding the judge overturning Tom Brady’s 4-game-suspension from #Deflategate. Poor Roger Goodell, he just can’t seem to win. Will this be the ruling that ultimately does Goodell in?
Will this be the end of his reign as commish? Patriots fans aren’t worried about that now. Their focus is on week one with their starting QB back at the helm. Kinda stinks for that backup quarterback who really thought this would be his big break…..
In corporate news, the LEGO company is making a CRAP TON of money. They turned a 1st-half profit of $2.1 billion! That’s like Walter White kinda money. Just think about that every time you step on one of those suckers & feel like amputating your foot from the pain….
In “I can’t believe that actually happened” news, two women in New Jersey were fired for starting a fight club at the day care where they worked.
They instigated fights & then filmed these children (ages 5-10!) just going at it before sharing it on social media. Rule number one of fight club: don’t share it on social media, duh!
Good news college students! Taco Bell has announced that they are rolling out delivery in select locations! This is great news for my wallet & terrible news for my waistline…but at least they know what we really want! Screw breakfast - bring me a cheesy gordita crunch right to my door!
Apparently we can’t make it through a week without making a Donald Trump joke. As we near November the debates are only going to get tougher and I’m sure the content here will only get better & better. (We hope!)
Mark your calendars, the next Republican Primary Debate is on Sept. 16th. Be sure to follow along on Yik Yak!
Thanks for stopping by! Keep submitting these hilarious jokes each week & you just might see your yak featured here. One more joke for the road…..